i was reading recently that most people quit weight loss programs within six months, but those who don’t have an easier time keeping it off. (i can’t find my source, so you’ll have to trust me. or it could be a big lie, whichever tickles your fancy.) my six months was on march 28. i had planned on doing this big “look at how awesome i am!” post on march 28, but that date has, obviously, come and gone.

i started off march doing really well; i lost about 3 pounds the first week and half. and then i was gone every weekend that month either helping with a wedding (for a friend, calm down), or out of town for the sacramento lindy exchange. and i really didn’t care about what i ate for about 3 weeks and ergo gained about a two pounds back.

right around march 28, i realized that i had to make a conscious choice: i could give up and not care about what i ate or whether or not i sat and watched tv for hours every day. or i could get back on track, make a meal plan, track my calories, and really start exercising again. i seriously pondered this for a few days. plan a is certainly easier, but is it really what i wanted to do?

up until september, i think that my being obese was not a conscious choice. sure, i decided what i put into my mouth and whether or not i got up and really moved, but i didn’t really think about the consequences of it. if i had to buy bigger clothes, so be it. it’s just something that happens in life, and hey, new clothes!

what i came to realize was that i’ve really changed in the past six months. i haven’t lost as much weight as i wanted to have lost at this point, but still, 20 pounds is 20 pounds. that’s pretty cool. and i don’t ever want to have those 20 pounds back. i feel tons better after i exercise and eat well, and i feel horrid if i don’t. so i decided to keep on going and pushing towards a healthier me. even if it takes years to get there, i’ll get there.

i read this awesome quote today from lyn on escape from obesity:

I don’t want to be a slave to my desires. I don’t want some stupid food to dictate my life. To tell me how big I will get, whether I’ll be able to walk in a year, whether I will have a heart attack before I am 50. I don’t want to turn over my ability to play with my kids or fit into my clothing to an ice cream bar.

amazing, no? i’m going to put that on my wall, along with the definition of food (thanks to yell at your fat), and a quote to seek after things of eternal consequence from elder bednar from april 2009 conference.

oh! if you’re not listening to yell at your fat, you should be. go check it out on itunes. seriously. right now. she’s a little off the wall, but absolutely fantastic, and incredibly motivating. i’m pretty sure i would have given up during my 3-week hiatus were it not for her.

grateful for:

1. conference/continuing revelation from God
2. supportive family, friends, and coworkers who keep me motivated & honest
3. yell at your fat
4. i ran/walked 2.5 miles yesterday without shin pain
5. being back in a structured swim program is fantastic
6. i didn’t give up!